Save

So I was driving home yesterday from Pilates training and it's about a 30-minute drive to and from. This is plenty of time to listen to my heartsong "Hosanna" about 17 times:) It's a version sung by Hillsong United, quite possibly the best live version of this song I've ever heard. I think I've listened to this song more than 17 times, maybe about 92...somewhere around there. But what I love about listening to one song over and over is that at some point the words click. And then not just the words, but the meaning of the words. For me, repetition is soothing, so I can literally listen to the same song all day long and not grow tired of it. Because I choreograph, make up scenes in my head, picture a worship session, or a production, or just enjoy the climactic nature of a song. And there is a small set of verses smack dab in the middle of the song, at the peak of its emotion. And the words go like this:

Cleanse my heart and make it clean,
Open up my eyes to the things unseen,
Show me how to love, like you have loved me.

Break my heart for what breaks yours,
Everything I am for your Kingdom's cause,
As I walk from earth into eternity.

And I'm just singing these words, worshiping, staging thing in my head, and it hits me. "break my heart for what breaks yours." God's heart breaks....it breaks. His heart literally shatters when things are going wrong! When we stumble, when we aren't as faithful as He would love for us to be, when evil gets in the way and we lose our focus, when his children are suffering! His heart breaks! God feels pain, he feels strong emotions, he hurts for us daily, he is broken for us daily. And I just wept. "Lord, your heart breaks! Break mine!" Then, I go on listening to the words realizing that I've been missing a huge message, and the line after that says "everything I am for your Kingdom's cause." Oh my goodness. EVERYTHING I AM, Lord, everything. It's your death wish to the Lord, "to the death father, everything I am, here it is." For your Kingdom's cause, as I walk from earth into eternity. It's not about down here, it's about up there and what I do until then! Who cares about HERE?!!! Everything I am Lord, for your Kingdom's cause, I just can't put into words how profound that is to me. Everything I am, everything I am.

If you haven't heard that song, listen to it. And listen to the whole thing. Listen to her worship and sing from the depths of her heart, listen to him cry out to the Lord, and listen to the people in the audience sing, because that's heaven. Who doesn't love to hear heaven...

And Hosanna is a Hebrew expression of "Save!"...in case you wanted to know:) Hosanna. Save.

~Lar