Tiny drought, but we let it go.

Hmmm...okay. I have completely abandoned that horrible picture thing, which I had read somewhere was very much promoted by the Kardashian sisters. As much as they are beautiful and I would love to own a hat or two of theirs, not people I want to model my life after--even down to a measly picture race. The real reason is that I am really bad at being consistent with things that leave you no room for creativity. And I'm stubborn, so unless it means something to me I can't keep it up.

Well, I think I've had the words sucked out of me somehow and I disappeared for about a week. But I enjoyed it. I do journal, but journaling...you can say whatever you want, like it's a letter to your Lord when here on mocholatte there is a filter.

I read this passage today out of Psalms. I love Psalms--it seems like everytime one opens to the book, there is a new set of poetic lyrics that David wrote that we've never read before. By we I mean me, I have not read ALL of Psalms, but I'm sure that will happen very soon. It's just so encouraging to be able to have a window straight into the praises and laments of David's soul. He takes the words right out of your mouth. And this passage that I read just totally described a new sort of closure that I've come upon, which needs a bit more prayer and direction before I share. The passage...

I am under vows to you, O God;
I will present my thank offerings to you.
For you have delivered me from death
and my feet from stumbling,
that I may walk before God
in the light of life.

~ Psalm 56:12-13

All I have to say about that, is that it is such an earth shattering blessing to feel, when you finally surrender to the Lord all that you hold dear, all you aspire to be, all that you love. And that this Creator, this King, this Sovereign Lord holds us dear to his heart, he has "delivered us from death and our feet from stumbling." What an honor it is to be able to walk before God in the light of life. What a true honor. He keeps us from stumbling, then lets us walk before him in his light. Please may that be the air in my lungs no matter what I face. Let that be the circulation in my veins, the fibers of my being, let THE Light of Life be all that I am and aspire to be.
I think that the real meaning of this, which has finally begun to settle into my heart started with Nathan's accident. Because it was almost instant, my reaction...."okay God, I get it, whatever else I'm holding onto please just take it. I get what you are trying to say to me. Take it all." Oh Jesus, when he takes away the things that are most important to you, or the person most important to you, you realize where you need to just let go. Open clenched fists. And let go.

~Laramie